Mr Dettman – 9En1 – Letter to the Town Council

Due: Thursday, 11th June

Following your Dartmouth Tourist Town debate, turn your three points into a Formal Letter, in which you attempt to communicate three transformative things to the Town Councillors, that Dartmouth needs, in order to become a vibrant, attractive town for tourist, young people and other residents  alike (e.g. like the recent ‘Indoor Pool’ debate).

Vocabulary – Can you transform vocabulary in your initial three points, into vocabulary more suitable for (‘distinguished’!) members of the Town Council?  Remember, this needs to be respectful and formal.

Connectives – How can you link your points/ideas?  Can you use discourse markers (‘paragraph connectives’ – e.g. Firstly; Furthermore etc.) to connect paragraphs, in a more ‘discursive’ (progressing from one point to another) essay?

Openers – How will you use strong openers, to engage the reader?  Can you use any rhetorical/persuasive devices as we looked at during speech-writing?

Punctuation – Commas and full stops are a must.  However, can you use higher level punctuation, like: colons; semi-colons; a dash; ellipsis; or brackets?


11 thoughts on “Mr Dettman – 9En1 – Letter to the Town Council

  1. katie s

    Dear Sir / Madam,
    I am writing to you today, to suggest three things, which will improve the tourist attraction that Dartmouth recieves. Dartmouth is a beautiful town, which deserves all the attention and wealth it recieves. Dartmouth is, however, not recieving enough interest.

    Dartmouth could hugely benefit from lower house prices, making it more appealing to second home buyers, and locals. The house prices in Dartmouth are quickly soaring, driving people out of the town. This is disastrous, such a lovely place, with such beautiful surroundings is turning into a ghost town, occupied on the weekends only.

    Another thing I feel Dartmouth would hugely benefit from, is cheaper shop prices. I feel that the shopping in the town is hugely overpriced and that is why most shops are closing down only a month or two since they opened. Dartmouth has potential to be one of the nicest tourist attracting towns in Britain, it just needs to tighten up on some areas.

    The last thing I am suggesting Dartmouth may benefit from, is more transport services to and from the town. Dartmouth is slowly being cut off from the rest of the world, the transport services are slowly stopping, and there are now several villages and small towns that are completely cut off from the area. A few towns and villages have no more bus services at all, and they are struggling to get access to Dartmouth.

    To conclude, I think that Dartmouth is hugely overpricing itself, and could do a whole lot better if it were more connected to the local community. Dartmouth is slowly cutting itself off from the local area without realising it, and could very easily become a ghost town if action isnt taken soon.

    1. Georgia

      Dear sir/madam,
      I am writing in relation to the issues surrounding Dartmouth’s rather limited tourist industry.

      Our town is one of the most picturesque destinations in Britain, with its sweeping valleys; places of historical importance, and the busy River Dart, it is a place that clearly attracts an older demographic. However, I think Dartmouth possess a rare quality(outstanding natural beauty) which means little has to be done to attract more than one sector of the population. I think that some shops should be changed to appeal to a younger audience, that way, children and teenagers are interested and their parents spend more money, contributing more to the local economy.

      Secondly, The Dartmouth Music Festival; Food Festival, and Royal Regatta attract a wide range of age groups for the short time of three days. Although their duration is short, they bring in more tourists than any other time of the year, so I think we should introduce more three day festivals/celebrations These could include film festivals, horticultural festivals, or even celebration of local talent throughout Dartmouth and the surrounding areas.

      Lastly, I would like to raise recognition of limited parking and transportation systems in place. With few parking spaces and buses to only a few of the surrounding areas, fewer people visit Dartmouth. Thus making it a somewhat isolated place. Perhaps more bus routes or more frequent bus stops could be put in place, to ensure a busier town and thriving tourist industry.

      I appreciate that Dartmouth is only in possession of limited funds and that changes are sometimes hard to make, but Dartmouth could be a huge attraction and a more well respected place with just a few adaptions.
      Yours faithfully,

  2. Jonah

    Dear Mr Councilman,

    I am writing to you to complain about the recent growth of tourists in our beloved town. I believe strongly that tourists do, whether we like it or not, pretty much decide if the town will either flourish, or become a ghost town like other seaside resorts across the country.

    My first concern is how inconsistent the local shops income is. Almost all shops survive on about ten weeks of business alone for the whole year. This means that the shops are not only poor and run down, but also means that getting a consistent job in this picturesque part of the south hams is almost impossible. As a result this means that almost everybody in the town either doesn’t work or are rich enough to live here without a job.

    This big class divide brings many problems to the town. For example when analysing the data polls you can find on the website we can clearly see there are many times more old age pensioners in the area than compared with the national average. The reason for this is the high prices in the area, so only the rich retired can afford to live in the town. This means that there is a huge strain on healthcare in the area, and with more older people moving to the town, it doesn’t look like it will change.

    But it isn’t all bad as it does give the town a massive amount of money. The huge tourism industry we have here means we can get more teenagers in work, even if it is only for 10 weeks. To add to that we are also providing much needed cash for the transport industry, with the park and ride playing a big role in getting people in the town for the big events.

    In conclusion I feel you need to put less pressure on the tourism industry by letting bigger employers build factories and quarries giving the working class people a way of earning money, without loosing any appeal to the tourists that come to the town every year.

  3. Katie

    Dear Whom it may concern,

    I am writing to inform you on what Dartmouth needs in order to make it more tourist-friendly.
    Now, Dartmouth is already a beautiful town as it is, however, it isn’t as tourist-friendly as it seems like it should be; let me explain.

    So, firstly, the car parks and public transport are usually full in the hotter months. This ruins people’s commutes, if they have to use the transport to get to work every day. My resolution for this is that we add more car parks.

    Second of all, we need to improve the general demographic of the tourists. Dartmouth is usually stereotyped towards the older audience, but, to induce the variety, I feel like we need more festivals with acts that are, prehaps, a bit more well known. And we need more places in town that appeal to the teenage demographic.

    Finally, the whole space needs to me more clean, litter free, and sustainable.

    I hope my points are taken into consideration.

    Yours faithfully,

  4. Urchy

    To whom it may concern,
    I’d like to say this in order to tackle other peoples beliefs that Dartmouth is a failing tourist town:

    Dartmouth is not a failing tourist town because there are many tourist here in summer!
    I was speaking to my family and friends and they say that “Summers seem to get busier and busier despite the weather””, and I have to agree with them.

    Secondly, and this is for those that believe there is not enough to do in Dartmouth, we have lots of stuff to do here, including events every year such as Regatta, food festival, music festival and candlelight Dartmouth and more!

    Plus we have many beautiful walks to walk such as the historical Dartmouth surrounding areas such as castle cove and sugary cove with it’s spectacular view, or D

    Finally, lets go back to Regatta as I may have forgot to tell you that nearly one hundred thousand people visit Dartmouth during Regatta, swelling the town’s population of about six thousand, making Regatta one of the largest public events in the south West!
    Another thing, this is real evidence from reliable sources, where’s others is just personal experience! Are we really going to waste money on a things we don’t even need just because a few people said that? Really? “No” is the answer, thanks for reading this.

    By Tyler Urch

  5. Urchy


    Mistake at the end of paragraph 4, “Or D” was suppose to say “or Dartmouth itself.

    My bad.

  6. Nadia

    Dear Sir or Madam,
    I am writing to you concerning Dartmouth’s tourist industry. There are many positives and negatives based on this subject.

    Firstly, a negative. The prices in shops are going up and are out-pricing the locals. This means that it may be out-pricing the tourists and putting them off coming to visit Dartmouth in the future.

    Secondly, a positive and a negative rolled into one. Regatta and the music festival gets tourists into Dartmouth and gets good business for shops and small business’. However all the tourists block the streets and leave litter on the streets and in the river.

    Lastly, another positive and a negative rolled into one. The parking is always full of tourists vehicles. this in one way is good because it shows that Dartmouth is popular. However it is also bad because people could go for at least half an hour without being able to get a space.

    I hope my points are useful.

    Yours Faithfully

  7. keeley

    To Whom It May Concern,
    I am writing to you to tell you about our ever growing town.
    I believe that the house prices are rising in Dartmouth and are getting unaffordable for locals, pushing locals out of Dartmouth. This causes us to not make a lot of money in shops and local businesses as people are only renting or buying houses to stay in on weekends.

    I also believe that the public transport is being filled up to the brim with mainly visiting people, in a way I think that this is a great thing as it brings in a lot of income to the town but on the other hand I think that local people who have grown up and lived in Dartmouth most of their lives cant get around on public transport like buses, trains and ferries.

    To conclude I think that house and shop prices need to be reduced to help local people strive in work and to help them to remain in Dartmouth instead of being pushed out by people that don’t stay full time in a house in Dartmouth

  8. lucybranton

    Dear Sir/Madam,

    My name is Lucy _______. I am in Year 9 at Dartmouth Academy, and I am writing concerning the blatant issue: ‘Is Dartmouth a Failing Tourist town?’

    I would like to discuss and clarify the main concerns regarding tourism in Dartmouth- is it failing ; is it succeeding?

    There are several problems with tourism in Dartmouth. On one end of the scale, tourism here is good for Dartmouth as it generates (albeit not-so-stable) income. However, it does have negative effects on the locals. As you can see below, tourism is the main source of problems here in Dartmouth. Here are some concerns:

    * Tourists take up local parking:
    – This is a serious problem in Dartmouth. Although tourism is a good source of income, tourists needs often get placed above the locals needs. This means that tourists get the parking, whereas locals have to fight for far-away spots in town.
    – This problem could be resolved by building another car park. Dartmouth is at its maximum capacity and uttermost accommodation for tourists (almost overflowing, and at the point where in certain season’s popular restaurants have to turn customers down) and an over-flow carpark would be the perfect solution for this.

    * Tourists take up public transport:
    – It’s great that tourists are taking a liking the town, and want to take the bus into town. Taking into consideration that if the parking down-town is all filled up, and public transport is full, leaving locals with the unfair consequence of having no way except walking to get down to the bottom of Dartmouth for work, or their own recreational time.
    – If you decided to build an extra car-park (as I recommended earlier in my letter), then this wouldn’t be a problem. An alternate solution would be to run another bus, or run the buses more frequently.

    * Jobs are inconsistent:
    – As tourism comes in short bursts, so do jobs- businesses need extra hands for when the shops get busy, and this can be a great way for teenagers in Dartmouth to earn some spending money for the summer.
    -However, as tourism is inconsistent and extremely seasonal, this means that the jobs are also irregular, and hard to come by as a full-time job. This is unfair on the people who want to work- not just in the summer, but also in the winter-months.

    Ending on a lighter note, I would like to briskly point out some encouragingly positive impacts that tourism has on Dartmouth:

    * Businesses prosper.
    * Local festivals thrive.
    * There is a high income to the town.

    I would like to thank you for your generous time in this important matter.

    Yours sincerely,
    Lucy _______.

  9. Julius

    Dear Sir/Madam,
    I am writing to you because I´m very concerned about the recent growth of tourists in our beautiful city of Dartmouth. I´m shocked to face the fact that the future of Dartmouth and the whole of Torbay are fully dependent upon tourists, and if we don´t change anything about it, we´ll soon end up like many other cities, which have become ghost cities.
    Especially the lack of continuity of this business bothers me. One event, like a big fire; an accident during one of the festivals or just growing rivalry between cities might cause our whole economy to fail, leaving us as a city of the old, with no jobs and therefore no future. Also the complete dependency on tourists brings us into a misery, when actions are necessary that are vital to the tourists, but kill the flair of our town, like a extend of the infrastructure.
    This massive difference in interests will cause a lot of problems in the near future, because it might bring us into situations where we have to decide between the happiness of the people living here, and the happiness of the people that make this beautiful life available for us, the tourists. And I see the day coming where our council will make a decision that is obviously bad for the locals, but also is the only way to keep the income during the tourist season consistent.
    But it isn’t all bad as it does give the town a massive amount of money. As long as the tourists come, we have jobs for young people, meaning we have a bright future and a good life. But we must not forget all the risks that come with such a concentration on one part of the economy.
    To conclude, I have to say that I´d appreciate an opening to different parts of the economy.
    Yours faithfully
    Bulius Jusjan


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